Daily writing prompt

What could you do differently?

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Life goes by fast if you let it.

Today I was thinking about how my daughters and I used to live in a tiny home in a resettlement area in the province. The memory surfaced while I was watching Carol & The End of the World. In one episode, Donna visits her family for the holidays, and her grown kids reminisce about memories she couldn’t recall because she had been working so much. It left her feeling dejected—and it left me feeling the same.

I remember that tiny house, back when my daughters were so small and so adorable. They would try to pull my attention away from work or from crying over whichever jerk I was seeing at the time. “Mommy, mommy.” They were my only constants. Even then, I knew that phase wouldn’t last forever, that I should savor it. But still, I let the moments pass. Now 10 years later, all I’m left with are memories made of blur. I can’t believe it’s been that long since my children were little. And that I didn’t spend every waking moment showing them how much I loved them. Now they’re 17 and 13, and they spend much of their time on their own.

What a tragic cliché, right? Some people try to comfort me by saying I did the best I could with what I knew and had at the time. I have to agree with them, or I might never forgive myself. They tell me this feeling will pass, that my daughters will come around in time. I can only hope they’re right.

I want to try to make life go slow if I could. Cherish my children while I still could. This is what I would do differently if I could.